Sans teeth san eyes ,sans ….. Change.Corona,and after.

This was written some time ago . Reflects a moment/ moments in time early corona virus time in WA. Found it languishing in blog and waiting to be cut. Am putting it out as is warts and all as I think it’s honest if wordy, and makes some still salient points 4 months after the crisis here in WA seems to have dissipated

In my newly assumed mode of sending off blogs directly ,minimum agonising and minimum fiddling with edit.Hopefully we wont be,like Shakespeares ancient, sans everything at the end of this period of isolation and social distancing.Hopefully we will not be sans conscience again .But I’m not naive enough to think that the world will become a spiritually and ethically transformed place.We are human after all.I cannot write on behalf of the universe.I can only write much closer to home.In fact at home.I want to document some of the circumstantial and purposeful changes made within my part of the household from about the middle of March 2020.

AND THIS IS ME COOKING PUMPKIN SOUP

Cooking .Although I was cooking before ,now there is no possibility of going out ,especially to our weekly whole family catch up at the Fremantle Markets .I distrust take away ,so cooking more and more ,and tackling new recipes as it gets boring doing the same old healthy ,vego food .In fact it is getting boring cooking each night anyway .My fervour for cooking a while ago when I was focussed on growing food,eating unprocessed ,exercising regularly and exploring different types of exercise is languishig .I suspect because the crisis of illness and treatment has passed .With the wider threat of CV I can as all humans do I relax into old habits.Also it’s winter and my appetite is returning but not my sense of taste,so sugar and high carbs are great.

They say one is nearer to God in a garden

Gardening .At the end of the summer I had decided to pull most of stuff remaining out.The tomatoes especially had not justified the money, time and effort spent on keeping them going and the few small unappealing fruits on the drying branches did not warrant anymore attention.But I have had to try again,attempting to recapture the old magic of anticipating the first shoot or leaf to pop up.The first part is the best.Rather like pets.Sweet when little and then they become a burden as well;pets have to be fed and walked and taken to the vet.They cost money and time.As do vegie gardens

Efficient food shopping: Efficient but limited. Using a standard supermarket as in the early morning there are few people and it is safer.But vegies from supermarket are not very satisfying.The texture and taste contributes to my diminished interest in preparing food.Also of course in this time of social distancing there are no longer friends to cook for.There are none of those family dinners where we pooled scrumptious recipes and sat around talking and drinking while the kids did cartwheels and wrote stories or drew.Those evenings with their fun and closeness have exited stage right as the CV has entered centre stage.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

Find another supplier and stop winging .

Lets look on the Bright side: Nevertheless I’m not spending time going to various places for vegies,or meandering my way through Op shops(Op shops deserve a blog all of their own ).We are saving about $50 a week not doing the morning walk up to our local cafe for coffee and muffin.Take away coffee ? Well its Ok occasionally when one just has to grasp some semblance of the old ways ,and needs to talk to someone other than oneself and husband .But its not the same ,we all know, as sitting down at a table in the sun, grabbing the paper of someone to flick through and then watching the passing walkers and cyclists ,and even the cars on the highway.I’m not wasting time though,no lengthy sit at coffee or extended walk.Now its coffee at home in the newly arranged back garden:paving swept,pond improvised, flowers ,some veggies

WOW I HADNT REALISED HOW GREAT THE GARDEN LOOKED A FEW MONTHS AGO -THE SUMMER

All the paraphenalia surrounding Thompson lives removed until it finds its way back.Like the shovels and remnants of washing that has blown off the line, rotting cuttings sitting in jars of black liquid ,bits of paper that have missed the bins .There are various things to be thrown out (only now there is no Resource Center) : malfunctioning goods, broken furniture ,old mattresses .So they have had to join their mates in the rapidly filling back room.

PS also my store room -all this healthy eating requires tins of chic peas and tomatoes ,lots of beans and lentils , assorted flours ,brown rice -Im sure you know -and there is no room for lots of loo paper or sanitiser!!

Transportation and Communication

Yes its a pleasure to walk across the highway now and not have to dodge cars on my way to the beach .Can we discover that we can do without cars ,or at least that we dont have to drive everywhere ,And we dont have to have a car for each member of the household

I see a lot more people walking just in my neighbourhood, and certainly more people are stopping to talk .There are people sitting on their walls with a drink in their hands ,all socially distancing but chatting with a neighbour on a wall across from them People are a lot more eager to talk, especially women .There are small groups of children playing games outside on ovals or lawns supervised by parents and mostly moving apart .Families are looking for way s of getting their children outside and away from technology for part of the day .

All this is good.I hate to qualify with another statement -but Fremantle and its surrounds is not a typical suburb:it is predominately middle class with a mix of older people and younger families and laid back ,alternative lifestyles Many of us walk and cycle anyway and are involved with the community.We are so lucky with our surrounds -beach and river and parks .We do not live cheek by jowl in a small one bedroom apartment in a crowded city trying to survive on little money ,and unable to get out .

To Conclude :

Perhaps the biggest change these last few months has been communication

The community I live in has changed for the better in that people are moving around and relating more closely to neighbours.For me personally the social distancing and isolation has had a flip side .There have been positive changes :the focus on life here at home ,getting jobs done ,more writing and reading ,less restless moving around and more targeted activity ,a greater reliance on figuring stuff out on my own .looking at my thoughts instead of moving on to be distracted.

The flip side is that the relating via technology or at best via 1.5 m apart is an emotional separation.The more I don’t speak face to,face,laugh,argue ,touch or hold the wider the gap.This is especially true with grandchildren.

Perhaps the thing I miss most in CV time is the hugging .

So I have my teeth ,my eyes are extra sharp at the moment ,and I and many of us here have if not everything ,much more than a lot of the rest of the world Lets be thankful.Let me be thankful .Maybe I can learn to think emotion into those air hugs .

“I’ve got a little list “Not Koko’s ,my own

Thank you Gilbert and Sullivan! (Mikado).-I’ve added you to my list of quotes and listings .

BUT my lists are not little.Nor ,unlike the list Koko sings in the Mikado,are my lists about the people I would like to eliminate -the “pestilential nuisances,”….the unfortunate person with flabby hands and a weak handshake, the lady novelist ….My lists contain things to do ,to get ,to strive for .They stretch back years.

In fact I was going through some of my old writing the other day ,looking for pieces about babies and discovered a list written in the Darwin Hospital 40 years ago . .What struck me about this list (apart from it still sitting there all that time):

What reason did I write it ?

How stupid to go writing lists on the day after a birth

Did I actually do the items listed ?

So why do we /I write lists ? I write daily ones ,weekly ones ,yearly ones-ie goals for the year and then fit the months and weeks to the goals. These lists I do evaluate ,but often the same goal recurs year after year .

I write shopping lists ,birthday lists, task lists ,books to read and find in library, films to see,Spanish phrases to use or find meaning or learn questions to ask doctors/psychs/ google ,you name a list type or subject and I have it.When I was working used to number items 1-5 and start at the beginning.I rarely got past the no 2s.Because lists regenerate themselves :there are lists within lists.Rather like renovations -start off doing one thing and others pop up.Sometimes it can be like starting a fire ,and one should tick off and eliminate or lists and renos become raging fires which consume the creator. Like Phoenixes rising .

Reasons for List making (I am comfortable disclosing these reasons)

Makes me feel like life is in control ,that I can look at a list and tick at least one item off and feel like I have accomplished something

Seems like I am organised ,and my life is mapped

Keeps me busy

Prods memory

Stops my jumping from one thing to the next and not completing

Stops me buying duplicates or foodstuffs I don’t need

(This does not always work.I have a large stock of chic peas and sanitisers from the recent CV time-just because I couldn’t manage to read a list and hold stuff with my gloves,as well as hurrying to leave shop before too many people

Have you ever purchased your own Op shop donation?)

Other reasons (not so comfortable about these)

My love of lists started as a child when we moved between countries or between places in the same country ,and between schools.Lists made me feel like life was sustainable and the core of it would stay the same ,as I was instrumental in composing my own lists.

Lists trick one into thinking that life is predictable The fact that a number of items are not done or never eventuate is irrelevant .They have been written down and still somewhere in the world they exist ,done or not

Anxiety shifter – I can list an item even if unable to do it :with mathematics for example which I never really understood ,I could write a list of formulas and felt better

Procrastination

I feel needed .I have some important things to do .Lists fill in empty spaces and unused time .They also compensate for the things I should be doing instead of writing the list

Some lists are creative and imaginative.There is an art in list writing and tallying up.Its a jogger of memory and can spark future possibilities ,many of which are not achievable.But no matter

I am a list addict .I just hear the word”list”and feel happy.It has a soft ,comfortable sound which resonates in my busy head

See -I’m writing a list here and I should be composing a creative blog entry

If you are reading this ,please let me know about your listing habits.I can add your reasons for making lists to a list.

And No,I didn’t do those items in the Hospital/Baby list.No lists for a while either .Babies are a listing cure.

Jimmy in Broome

ANGEL CHILD
THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE

Last night tonight
Last time
To hold you tight
Tell you all about
The world .

Holding you close
Sweet smelling child
Singing you dreams
Whispering

She’s coming home tomorrow
Last chance
Breathing together
Lying intertwined
I love you
But you’re not mine.

She’s coming home tomorrow
The love of your life
She’s back with you tomorrow
The love of your life
She’s here tomorrow
Last night tonight.

Lie here with me
Skin to skin
I’ll hold you tight.